Trust is fragile as a vase, once shattered it needs to be gingerly glued back together. Given how difficult rebuilding trust after cheating can be, it may sound like mission impossible to the average person.
Step 1: Take Full Responsibility
They should fully take responsibility for their actions by the person who violated trust. No excuses, no blame game and degrading the issue. And a real apology is one that recognises the ways in which it has been damaging, and ends with understanding.
Step 2: Create Transparency
Transparency rebuilds trust; secrets destroy it. So this could look like… giving your passwords, letting them know where you are, being honest about how you feel, real honesty. Initially transparency is uncomfortable, but it makes us safe. For Couples Counselling Cheltenham, contact www.cheltenhamcounsellor.co.uk/couples-counselling-cheltenham
Step 3: Establish New Boundaries
Each partner must tell the other what they need in order to feel secure going forward. Boundaries are not a punishment, they are protective forces that give room for the healing.
Step 4: Show Consistent Actions
Rebuilding that trust won’t come with words, but rather only repeated behaviour over time. But in the world of meaningful relationships, small daily actions that show consistency and kindness trump any grand gesture every time.
Step 5: Practice Patience
Healing isn’t linear. The partner who was hurt will have good days and bad days. Trying to rush the process or forcing forgiveness prematurely only works in reverse.
Step 6: Consider Professional Help
A neutral third party can sometimes help facilitate conversations and offer strategies to repair trust successfully.
The Reality Check
Reestablishing trust is a process that can take many months, sometimes years. If it does, the relationship that is created in its wake can be even stronger.
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